The Danger of American Pride
“American by birth, southern by the grace of God” is something that I heard growing up from humorist and author Lewis Grizzard. I absolutely loved his storytelling and perspective; in fact his books became part of my bedtime stories when I was a little older. My dad would read to me from his collection of books by Grizzard. There were moments that made me laugh out loud and there were moments that brought forth a lot of emotion and feeling. I grew up on these stories as well as on the belief (and the song) that “I’m proud to be an American”. My dad and his dad had both served in wartime. I said the pledge at school every morning. This was the greatest country in the history of countries. I recall when I was around ten or eleven, my dad and I waking up to go watch a convoy of troops who were being sent overseas for Operation Desert Storm. My heart swelled with pride seeing these people going off to fight evil in the world under this flag.
As I grew older, I bristled at lyrics or articles that seemed to question this country or the leadership in place. Don’t these people know this is America? We are so fortunate to live here, just look at how many people immigrate here every year! I was baffled that anyone would not see the greatness that was inherent within these borders. We had so much, and so many countries around the world seemed to want to have a slice of what we were having whether it be importing our brands or asking for assistance and partnering with us. Clearly, we were onto something and the world liked it. When the terrorist attacks of September 11th happened, it felt like finally the entire country was on the same page. There was a sudden swell of pride and love for the USA. Everyone the world over rallied around us, surely that must show how great we are.
My God am I dumb. You see, I was part of a tribe. I believed I was part of something greater than myself and was bonded with everyone who was a citizen of this nation. “One Nation, undivided, with Liberty and Justice for ALL”. How great is that? Pretty great if you are middle or upper class and white, even better of you are male. Somehow, along the great indoctrination of national pride, I missed out that I had privilege that put me at the head of the class. Somehow, I missed out that not everyone has the same upbringing and experience within the world I lived in day-to-day. That’s not part of the elementary, middle school, nor high school curriculum, and if you don’t have someone show you, you may never discover that. I had friends who looked different than me. I went to a school that was pretty diverse and always assumed everyone had pretty much the same experiences in life on a daily basis. I was painfully naïve.
I have bought into a notion that every citizen of this country has the same experience and opportunity. That we are all created equal and receive the same treatment. Along the way though my eyes have been opened. You see the oneness I believed in for the nation was not actually there. The lives of more people than I ever realized were vastly different than mine. I assumed that the people who escaped the projects were just like the people who escaped the trailer parks. People who found a way to seize on opportunity based on their skillset and escape the lives their parents had. That was the American Dream, right? I didn’t realize that much of the language that I believed united us as a people came with an imperceptible asterisk beside the words that sounded uniting. I didn’t recognize that the struggle for equality was ongoing. I believed that was solved the generation before I was born with marches, powerful speeches and sit-ins. It wasn’t until I became a father that I began to gain a new perspective. That this precious child of mine was automatically at an advantage because they were white. I watched as my beliefs slowly crumbled before me. The very thoughts I held that I believed united us were actually the things that were tears in the fabric of this country. I watched astounded even further as division seemed to be the primary goal in society and politics now. Suddenly, politics wasn’t about “doing what’s best “for the people” but it was about “blocking the other team because they are inherently bad and evil people who are going to come for you in the night”.
Somehow, I had missed as things shifted from a place of unity to instead a place of deep divineness and ongoing opposition for the sake of opposing. People who identified as different than you, were to be opposed because they weren’t “us”. The immigrants who built this country and who have continued to come seeking the great opportunities we advertise were suddenly viewed as evildoers here to do harm to us. The very words of the pledge were deemed meaningless because the “patriots” were and are actively working to divide what I truly believed to be a great nation. I wholeheartedly believe in “united we stand, divided we fall” not just as an American saying, but as truth in life. Within a family, an organization, a community, a nation, and even globally. We are all humans. We are all the same a soul encased in a bundle of flesh. We may look, speak, believe, and a thousand other things differently, but we are all blood, hearts, and humanity. If we came together as a people (we are all people in fact) think of the good it would do the world. Think of the power of everyone UNITING rather than bickering or fighting. I love that you are different, it means I get a diverse menu of food, language, beliefs and other cultural delicacies that otherwise I may not have encountered. Those things are to be celebrated, and my poor pronunciation of certain menu items aside, I love being able to experience these things that are not inherently my own. But I am left to wonder why it is that the people who scream the loudest about how great this country is seem to be the ones who are working so hard to destroy it, judging people who look differently, locking up people who speak differently or are not born within the borders many of our families weren’t historically speaking born in either.
Look for commonality in people. Look for an opportunity to share in the unique experience of being human with someone else. Find that “you like this? Hey me too!” moment and see how the same we actually are. People love to talk about baseball as America’s past time. When you watch the Little League World Series (clearly you have to if you are a diehard American, right?!?) you see these children from all over the world and the US come together united in their love of a game. You see children who speak differently, look differently, and have vastly different backgrounds come together and do the same thing at the same time in the same place. That’s unity. That’s common ground. The kids just want to play ball and we encourage and love that. Yet somewhere along the way, some adults decided you only want to play ball with people who are identical to you. This absolutely robs us of the very thing that makes us and the world over great. It’s time to be proud to be a human. It’s time to be proud of the things that we share across borders, across cultures and across every continent. Don’t buy into hate, divisiveness and otherness. Buy into humanity, love and the joy of togetherness. I am proud to be a human and to see the shining examples of how great humanity is to one another. Those other nations standing with us on 9/11? They weren’t here for us because “AMERICA!!!!” they stood with us in humanity, in mourning a deep tragedy that had befallen people. They loved us because we were in darkness. They cared enough to lend their voice to our wails, their hands to our causes, and their homes to our people (looking at you Canada). It wasn’t about America. It was about humanity and seeing the way people tried to rob us of that. And you know something? Maybe the terrorists did win. Maybe they stole decades of love from the hearts of Americans. Here’s to finding love for thy neighbor again, the world over.